


Our Chance

by Bangtanboysboo



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Battle, F/M, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Love, Love Confessions, Unrequited Love, kiss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-03
Updated: 2018-09-03
Packaged: 2019-07-06 12:40:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15886254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bangtanboysboo/pseuds/Bangtanboysboo
Summary: Remus Lupin is one stubborn man. Nymphadora Tonks is one stubborn woman. This is a little look at how they came together.





	Our Chance

**Author's Note:**

> A little story of how Remus and Tonks came to be together. This takes place circa Order of the Phoenix, but I do apologize if there are things that are not factually correct or timeline appropriate. I tried my best to remain accurate to the books, but I wouldn’t be surprised if there are some discrepancies.

Tonks huffed and flopped back down on her hard bed. Even she had to admit that living with her parents at age twenty-five was embarrassing. Still, with the war raging on around the wizarding world, most would say it was wise. Tonks called it lack of funds. Being an Auror didn’t pay nearly as well as she had expected; not since the takeover of Umbridge and friends.  
Tonks let her mind wander aimlessly through the recent events that had brought her here. Here to her childhood bedroom in her parents’ house. It was safer living with her parents now that she had joined the ranks of the Order of the Phoenix via Auror Moody. He had insisted any extra protection was worth it. She didn’t understand why she couldn’t just live in 12 Grimmauld Place with everyone else. She had a certain affinity for one of the members of the Order and would have much preferred getting to spend time with him. After all, who knew how much time any of them had left?

She’d had a crush on Remus John Lupin (full name provided by the mischievous Sirius Black) since she had seen his mussed blonde hair and warm green eyes. She often caught herself daydreaming about cozying up in one of his baggy cardigans.

It was also the best option to move back into her childhood home. The few number of galleons in the bottom of her purse would hardly cover half of her rent. The Ministry had been cracking down on anyone who had even a hint at suspicious activities, and with her rebellious past Tonks had become an easy target. Less money apparently meant less chance at revolt according to the Ministry. Tonks was ripped from her moping when he mother called from downstairs.

“Nymphadora! Darling, dinner is ready!”

Tonks grumbled to herself about the use of her full name but pulled herself from the warm comfort of her bed. She looked around at the room that was now littered with bags and dirty clothes. She sighed and went downstairs to join her parents. 

 

“Mum, are you positive you haven’t seen my skirt?” Tonks called out from beneath a pile of clothes.

“Darling, I’m sure!” her mother yelled from the downstairs kitchen. Tonks huffed and pushed a shirt off of her head. Today was the first meeting with the Order in months, and Tonks wanted to have some semblance of her life together. She had so much nervous energy piled up and that had ended with her clothes covering almost every inch of her floor. She wanted to look nice but refused to admit it was become of one particular member. After another few minutes and too many glances at the clock, Tonks settled for her worn jeans and sweatshirt. She didn’t even want to look at the state of her hair, knowing it was a right mess. 

She was already running late and risked taking the floo network. If she changed her appearance enough, it should be relatively safe. Not like anyone would be able to track her to 12 Grimmauld place anyway. She called one last farewell to her mother, nearly forgot to grab her wand off the table, and hopped into the fireplace. 

The landing onto the front porch was not her finest and Tonks’ clumsy nature did not aid her. She practically fell through the door into strong arms with a breathless ‘oof.’ She was already muttering apologies and pulling herself back before she finally looked up.  
Her voice trailed off as she saw the face she’d been pining over for two months. Remus Lupin stood in front of her, his arms still lowering. He still looked same as ever with his bright green eyes and honey hair. The only thing different about him was a few new scars here and there from his previous transformations.

“Nymphadora,” he greeted. His hands returned to the pockets of his ragged trousers, but she did not miss his eyes looking her up and down. She felt more self-conscious now of her fashion choices.

“Remus,” she answered. She was still breathless from her trip. Her hand darted to try and smooth down her hair. She wanted to scold herself. She never acted like such a starry-eyed schoolgirl, but something about Remus always took her off guard. A warm hand came into her peripheral to push some of her hair behind her ear. 

Another voice from the stairs behind them startled them both and Remus’ hand retracted quickly. The booming, solid voice might strike fear into others, but Tonks felt only love and warmth. 

“Moody!” She called. She was trying her best to ignore whatever had just happened between her and Remus and eagerly moved her way towards her mentor. He however didn’t looked nearly as pleased to see her.

“Late again. Floo network? Really Nymphadora?”

“Oh, Come on Mad Eye,” she tried to brush off his scathing tone. “I’m an Auror. They won’t think twice about it- and I changed my appearance enough that they won’t even notice,” her plan sounded lame now. “And for the love of God, call me Tonks,” she muttered under her breath.

“Constant vigilance, Nymphadora. Meeting. In the kitchen. Now,” and he stalked off down the stairs. Tonks hated being so belittled, especially in front of Remus. She was trying her best to be as grown up and adult-like as possible in order to at least try to win Remus over. Living with her parents and the nasty telling off she had just received were not doing her any favors. She looked back over her shoulders to where he had been standing but found the spot empty. She groaned and made her way down the stairs.

The kitchen was abuzz with everyone in the order. She gave a weak wave at Harry from across the room, and Ginny beamed at her. Everybody settled down fast, and Tonks felt very embarrassed if they had waited just for her. She looked around, trying to find a seat and wanted to disapparte on the spot when she saw the only empty spot was by Remus Lupin himself. She gulped and then walked over, trying to appear nonchalant and failing miserably when she tripped over the leg of Mundungus Fletcher’s chair. She cursed loudly and kept her head down because she knew everyone would be staring at her.

“By the way, we weren’t waiting for you,” Remus whispered in her ear which caused her to jump. “You know how everyone gets carried away talking.”

That did make her feel slightly better and she steeled her resolve. She turned her head towards Remus and nodded her thanks before paying attention to the meeting at hand. 

“I swear, Harry! Never got caught in that corridor!” Tonks called one last time to the young boy before he departed with Moody. She laughed once more as her mood had drastically improved and she had practically forgotten about all the incidents from earlier. She walked back towards the kitchen in light spirits but slowed down when she heard harsh whispers coming from it. She sneakily leaned against the doorframe, trying to get as close as possible without giving herself away.

“You have to tell her some time,” She heard the voice she knew to be Sirius.

“I don’t have her tell her anything!” A harsher whisper, lower. Remus. She was confused by what she was hearing. Who could they possibly be talking about and why was Remus keeping secrets?

“Come on, Moony. The poor girl’s been pining over you for ages. Either tell her you feel the same way or break it off… whatever it is.”  
Tonks’ stomach was turning. She had a very distinct feeling she knew who they were talking about now. Remus… felt… the same way? That very thought made her heart skip a beat. For so long she feared he viewed her as just another stupid kid. A little girl pining over him. Now she knew he felt the same way. She bit her lip and her mouth spread into a grin. 

Just then, a mouse scampered over her toed causing her to gasp. The voices in the kitchen cut off abruptly, and she cursed her nerves.  
“You may as well come out from behind there, cousin,” Sirius called.

She moved into the kitchen like a naughty child that had just been busted. Remus looked uncomfortable, and his eyes darted around the room. Sirius looked just as uncomfortable as he glanced between them.

“Right then. I’ll leave you two to talk,” Sirius left the kitchen.

The atmosphere could have been cut with a knife. The tension between them was palpable and Tonks wanted to run for the hills.

“Dora,” Remus started.

“Remus,” they had spoken at the same time. “Sorry, you… you go ahead.” She was buzzing with anticipation. She hoped that Remus had finally been brought to his senses, and they could quit the awkward back and forth game. She couldn’t help herself as her thoughts drifted to how soft his lips would fe-

“I think we should stop talking, Dora,” he said. All her thoughts came to a halt. Not even his nickname for her could cushion the blow of his other words.

“We… what?” She asked while her mind reeled. That had been nearly the opposite of what she had expected. 

“I think that you and I should stop talking,” he said slower this time. “It is hardly appropriate and very dangerous for us to-”

“Have you gone completely nutty in the brain?” She cut him off. That shut him up for the moment as he stared at her. She took and few strides forward to which he promptly moved back, but the counter stopped him from moving any further. Her pointer finger was pushed into the front of his shirt. She knew her hair was probably morphing into a scarlet red as the anger boiled up from inside her. After all this time and a secret confession later, and he was just going to give this all up?

“Excuse me? My brain is working just fine, thank you,” he frowned. “I am a werewolf, Nymphadora. You’d have to be absolutely insane-”

Tonks did the only thing that her mind could process in the moment, the only thing that could possibly explain how she felt to him, the only thing that could possibly keep him from running away. She kissed him. 

He stayed stiff beneath her. She cupped his face in her hands as she moved her lips against his, but he stayed still. After a few moments she gave up and pulled away. Her eyes searched his for some sort of clue, but his eyes were stony and cold. She felt like a fool in that moment. She should have known that once Remus Lupin makes a decision he sticks to it.

“Right then. I’ll just… be going,” she exited the room quickly, cursing herself as angry tears leaked from her eyes. For the millionth time that day she felt like a stupid little girl. She didn’t even bother to change her appearance as she tugged floo powder from her pocket and departed from the fire place of 12 Grimmauld Place.

“Nymphadora, is that you?” her mother called from the kitchen as she stormed through the door.

Tonks didn’t reply to her mother at the risk of giving herself away. She knew her voice would betray her as her eyes still leaked tears. She hated that she let Remus make her feel so messed up. He didn’t want to be with her. Fine. But what if she couldn’t live without him?

She flopped on her bed face down and held her breath there as long as she could. She turned over with a gasp, her gaze focusing on the ceiling. What would it take to show Remus that he did indeed deserve to be loved? What could she do to prove that she could handle this?

Just as she was rolling over to grab the bottle of wine that resided by her bedside there was a large crash from downstairs. Tonks attributed it to her mother’s clumsiness, the trait she’d inherited, until that crash was followed by a scream. 

Tonks bolted from her bed, her heart racing, and flew down the stairs. The living room was already trashed as many burly men flipped chairs and shot fire curses at the curtains. Tonks let out a scream of her own. That caught their attention, but before Tonks could grab her wand from her back pocket, one of them shot a body binding curse at her and she fell the last few steps down and landed painfully on her side. One of the men walked up to her and she recognized him as Antonin Dolohov, and her heart froze in her chest.

“Been using the floo network lately, darling?” he stroked her cheek, and Tonks felt the urge to spit on him. Her body was still stiff and in pain, but Tonks could not get her mind off her mother. Where was she? Was she okay? Was she hurt? The dirty death eater kept talking. “We been monitoring you lately,” he grabbed hold of her bicep painfully tight and yanked her upwards. She cried out as he dragged her and threw her onto the couch. The tip of his wand fit under her chin and lifted her face so that her eyes met his. “Funny enough, you came out of nowhere today. Poof. Home. We know you and your little friends have been meeting. Only problem is we don’t know where. But you,” he chuckled darkly. “You gave us some idea today and I have a feeling you’re going to tell me.”  
More tears leaked out of Tonks eyes. She knew that she would never tell him where the Order was meeting. She also knew that she might die in withholding that information, but she was willing to do that too. The only thing that tore at her heart was that she had left in such anger from the Black house. Her last encounter with her best friend had been one of pain, and now she was probably going to die. She still had no idea where her mother was either and silently prayed that she would make it through this alive.  
Dolohov’s wand dug into her chin and Tonks was waiting for his first curse to hit her.

“Cru-”

Tonks waited for the pain to hit her, but nothing ever came. Her eyes were screwed tightly shut, and after a moment she dared to peek. Dolohov laid at her feet unconscious. Her body was still bound, but she moved her eyes around as much as she could to see what happened. 

Spells began to fly around the house wildly as the room was filled with Order members. Kingsley freed her, and she shot up, joining the fight. Sirius made his way over to her, hitting Death Eaters left and right. 

“Are you alright?” he shouted over the chaos. Tonks nodded and wiped the last of the tears off her cheeks. Her eyes caught Remus in the kitchen as he dodged and fought. He looked extremely handsome with his hair mussed, but she tore her eyes away. She couldn’t afford to get distracted.

After a few minutes, the house was finally quiet. The floors were littered with Death Eater bodies and some of the members, Kingsley, Snape, and Sirius offered to take the bodies and dump them somewhere, so they didn’t wake up at the house. Everyone was breathing heavily. The house looked worse for wear after the small battle, so they set to work fixing things here and there.

When Andromeda walked through the door, Tonks almost fell to the ground in relief. She had had no idea if her mother was alright. No idea if her mother was dead. She ran forward and engulfed her mother in a tight hug. Both were sobbing heavily with relief. At least for now they were both alright. Her mother pulled back and held Tonks’ face in her palms.

“Darling, I’m so sorry. I sent a patronus to the Order to warn them. I couldn’t get to you in time. I hardly made it out of here just myself. I tried to warn you, I-”

“Shh, mum. Mum it’s alright! I’m alright!” she pulled her mother back into her. Tonight had been a close call, and Tonks felt the growing dread in her stomach. This was all her fault. If she had just been less stupid, then none of this would have happened. She was going to hear about this for months from Moody. She wanted to beat herself up for endangering her family and her friends. 

Someone was hovering in the background. She could feel his stare and she pulled back from her mother. It looked like the reprimanding would begin sooner than expected. She wasn’t prepared for it to be Remus though. Great. Another opportunity for him to make her feel like a child.

“Mom, I should probably,” she started, gesturing at Remus. Her mother looked over her shoulder and then nodded her head. She wiped away her tears and then gave one final pat on Tonks’ shoulder. She joined the other in cleaning up the once beautiful manor.  
Tonks climbed her way over the rubble towards Remus. He put a comforting hand on her back and guided her towards the back of the house. The dread was slowly building in Tonks’ abdomen and she wanted nothing more than to turn and run. They passed through the door and sat on the stoop of the back door. 

“Listen I know I was a huge idiot. I made a stupid decision because I was hurt and irrational and-”

“I’m glad you’re okay,” Remus cut her off. She had planned to go into a whole spiel in order to avoid some of the telling off she was sure to get. His words and stopped her and left her dumbfounded. She wasn’t sure what to say now. His hand reached up and gingerly thumbed at a small cut on her brow. This behavior was incredibly strange for him. He had never dared to cross the border of physical touch, and now that he had Tonks had to fight leaning into his touch. Even so, it seemed like her body leaned unconsciously into his. He was being so soft with her, she wondered what had changed. 

“That being said, what you did was totally idiotic,” he started. Tonks’ eyes snapped open. She hadn’t been aware they had fluttered shut. Her body felt like ice now. “You put everyone in danger. Any one of us could have been killed.”

“I know,” she said looking down into her lap. “I made a stupid mistake. I’m lucky my own mother isn’t dead,” he vision had become blurry once more. A warm hand cupped her chin and pulled her face up and back towards him. 

“We’ve all made mistakes. This isn’t the first and won't be the last. Don’t beat yourself up about it too much,” his hand lingered there. Tonks leaned into his touch again. There seemed to be a pull of gravity between the two of them. The space seemed to shrink between them, and Tonks was silently begging that finally Remus had given in; finally Remus understood.

“Dora,” he whispered. He had moved his head just a fraction, but it was enough for Tonks to know. He had stopped himself once again. “You know we can’t.”

She felt the anger well up in her chest in an instant. She shoved him away hard.

“God, why do you always say that?” She cried out.

“You know why-”

“No, actually, I don’t,” she seethed. “You always… you always do this! You tell me no and then you get close to me. When I do the same, you push me away and give me the same bullshit answer every time,” she hit his shoulder a few more times for good measure. He let her do it without complaint. She wasn’t quite finished. “If we’re not allowed to be together, then one of us dies and the other will regret it until the end. At least if we're together and one of us dies, we would have had a chance at happiness. Why won't you give me mine?” her voice broke at the end. “Remus, give me a chance at happiness and I can give you yours,” she grabbed onto his cardigan. She leant in, and this time he didn’t move back, he didn't fight. 

When her lips touched his for the second time that day, Tonks noticed how different it was from the first time. Instead of stiffening up, he melted into her. Something had changed almost imperceptibly since the fight had gone down. A small shift had occurred between the two of them and it now seemed that they couldn’t live without one another. Remus, it seemed, had finally come to his senses. His hands held her close to him and explored her hair, his fingers twisting themselves into the locks. She could only imagine what color her hair was turning at the moment. They kissed until they were breathless and then kissed some more. Only after minutes and minutes did they finally break away from one another.

They simply stared into each other’s eyes for what felt like an eternity. They jumped apart when a voice startled them.  
“I’ve made food for everyone. I didn’t want to interrupt you two, but I figured everyone could do for a good hearty meal after everything,” Andromeda stated. She turned back inside, but Tonks noticed the smirk on her mother’s lips.

They got up hand in hand, Remus’ thumb drifting back and forth over Tonks’ knuckles. She felt warm and full for the first time in months. She pulled their hands to her lips and placed a warm kiss on the back of his hands. Though rough and weary looking, there was a warmness in Remus’ eyes that she had not seen in a long time. He smiled at her like she was the center of his world and they walked back into the house together with their hands swinging between them. 

She would not, could not lose him now. She would do whatever it took to protect him, and she had a feeling that he would do the same.


End file.
